Thursday, January 7, 2016

Play Ball

“C’mon, already.” Kieran banged his fist on the bathroom door. “Other people have needs too, you know. Are you drinking out of the toilet again? Did you fall in or what?”

The door swung open. “Bite me,” his roomie Dino said. Even though he was in human form, he shook himself all over out of habit. Kieran bared his sizeable teeth. Dino snarled at him and grabbed a towel.

“That’s three baths in the same week,” Kieran observed. “You must be really serious about this one.”

“Dude, you have no idea.” Dino stepped out of the bathroom, toweling his hair. Kieran slid past him and took possession, just to be on the safe side. “Chill. I’m done in there. I’m meeting Sharona in half an hour so I have to shake my tail.”

“Sharona,” Kieran echoed, and grinned at Dino’s growl. “Where’d you meet this one? In Tenny’s bar or behind it?”

“I’m gonna bite you in a minute. This one’s not a bar bitch. She’s human. She works at a restaurant down at the exit. The one that sells game burgers. Half the time she smells like elk grease.” He sighed happily.

“A human? From down at the exit?” Kieran stepped halfway back out into the hall, his bladder issues temporarily on hold. “How’d you meet this one?”

“Well, I was scouting around that nightclub down there—you know, the Caverns? The one that vampire runs? Which is why I went in my wolf form, and why I went during the day. She swears up and down she’s got nothing against shifters, but you know you can’t trust a bat.”

“I’ve got a boatload of relatives who are bats. Distant relations, but still.”

“That’s your own fault for being born a prairie dog. Anyway, as long as I had four legs on, I stopped by that little park there, you know, where they used to have the minigolf? Sniff around, mark a couple trees—”

“Bro. TMI.”

“Right. So I’m checking over the landscape and there’s this human kid playing with a rubber ball. He sees me, thinks I’m a dog, and throws me the ball. Dick that I am, I caught it. I should have just bitten the kid.”

“Things like that can get you shot in the human world.”

“Yeah, I know. Good thing I held off, because right then is when Sharona came over. Turns out she’s his mom.”

“She’s got a kid?”

“Yeah, I know. Sweet, right? Instant pack. How’s that for a time saver? I took one whiff of that meat aroma on her and that was it. Love at first sniff.”

“And she fell in love right back at you, wolf and all.”

“Wellllll, not so much. I had to follow her home—”

“Ah, stalking. The wolf equivalent of courtship.”

“Bite me, rodent boy. That kid of hers kept me playing catch for almost two hours. I swear, the little spore must have OCD or something. But it got me in good with her, so she didn’t mind me following her home. Then it was back to the car, get dressed, then show up at her door looking for my ‘lost dog.’ We got to talking, discovered we had a lot of common interests.”

“Like a love of meat?”

Dino grinned. “And the kid. Turns out he’s okay, when he isn’t chucking a ball at me. We play video games together. All three of us. Dude, she could be the one.”

“Have you told her the truth about your ‘dog’ yet?”

“I’m working my way up to it. I told her I found him, so she wouldn’t be looking around. I may have been in the park this morning. Playing catch. That’s why the extra shower.”

Kieran snickered. “You softy.”

“You rodent. If this does work out, I’m gonna have to buy that kid a puppy. Let him take his pitching impulses out on a real dog. One of those Jack Russells. The little hyper things. They can wear each other out. Leave me more time with Sharona. Scat! What time is it? I gotta get moving.” He darted up the hall toward his room.

At the same time, Kieran’s bladder stabbed him with an insistent reminder. The prairie dog shut the bathroom door. “Yeah. Me too.”


Serena Shay said...

LOL...playing fetch with a wolf. That would have been a sight to see. Too bad there were no pictures to share with the rest of the wolves around town. :)

Pat C. said...

There's a wolf sanctuary near where I live, and some of those lobos could pass for huskies. Or maybe they were hybrids. At any rate, if it acts like a dog, people will think it's a dog.

Though Dino's lucky none of his packmates spotted him, or his pic would be all over Twitter. Just try keeping your rank after that happens.