Thursday, September 15, 2011

Not Covered by Disability

(As long as we're going silly ... . Apologies in advance. This hit me and I felt compelled to share. As always, I blame caffeine.)

“So if you ain’t a natural-born shifter,” Louie said, “what the hell happened?”

“Magic,” Gil replied. “I wanted to be a wolf, so I worked a spell. Trouble is, I didn’t double-check all the ingredients first. Asshole sold me the wrong fur.”

Louie looked the squirrel up and down. Given his size, that took barely a second. “Tough break,” he commiserated. “I gotta ask, though. Why a wolf? I mean, you could’a been anything.”

“Yeah, I know. Don’t rub it in. I guess I picked werewolf because of all the great press they get. Not to mention the women. Werewolves score more than vampires.”

“That’s ’cause vampires can’t get the job done. Ain’t much a woman can do with a dead dick.”

“You got that right. Anyway, I would have taken anything big and dangerous. I mean, you’ve seen my human form. Fur and fangs got that beat all to hell.” He shrugged. “Plus it had to be an animal women go gaga over. If I had to do it over again, I’d pick tiger. You can’t mistake that fur.”

“You’d do it over again?”

“Hell yeah. I always wanted to be an animal. I got psychological issues that’d drive Dr. Phil up the wall.”

“So this is a case of, whaddaya call it … ”

Gil nodded glumly. “Pawness envy.”


Serena Shay said...

LMAO...ya just gotta love Gil and his reasoning's! You know who he reminds me of... The Dusty character in Twister. Love that character!

Great post, Pat!

Savanna Kougar said...

I luvs ya, Pat! ~cackling laughter happening~ That cartoon is just too good, and so is our Gil.

Pat C. said...

Now I'll have to watch "Twister." Hope the library has it.

Serena Shay said...

Oooh, I hope they have it for you cause it was a fun movie. :)